"Hello World"

Ahh what a weekend. And its not even over yet! I'm going to dedicate this blog to each and every person that I love in my life because I honestly don't know what I would do without them. Sometimes it takes something big to happen for you to really wake up and appreciate those that stick around. I stand by that. As someone who grew up with insecurity issues thinking that I had no one in this world, it sure as hell feels good to prove myself wrong. For every thing that has hurt me and made me feel like nothing, I thank every person who has lifted me back up again, myself included.

I talk all the time about following your heart or your head. Which one is the right one? We'll never know, it's one of the greatest mysteries in the world. I learned something this weekend though. It's not about following one or the other, it's about using them both. I quit smoking 8 weeks ago today. The past week has been the hardest. I want one when I'm stressed, after I eat, when I'm drinking, but I didn't. And the only way I can describe my will to resist is like this. When we want something, our heart aches for it. In this case, the only thing stopping me from giving in to my want is me head. I know it's going to hurt me down the road. No matter how much I want it, it's not good for me and I can't justify that. Even though I'm probably going to always want cigarettes, the want for them dies a little bit each and everyday.

This horrible analogy ultimately leads me to realize that life isn't always about choosing one or the other. Faith and will and strength. No matter what choice we make, fate's going to make sure that your life happens how it's suppose to be. Maybe that is a little optimistic but I'd rather live my life knowing that it'll work out down the road because I deserved it rather then stress about each and every move I make.

I woke up this morning and smiled. The sun came out and shinned through my window. Things are finally starting to fall into place and now more than ever I know that being a good person, loving with everything you've got, and moving on when you want to break down are qualities you would be blessed to have. I'm blessed, I'm happy, and I can't wait to see what happens next. Until next time, Over n' Out!

MW